Put your shoes on!

All the voices were telling me; my wife, my Trustees, my friends, the circumstances; the provision - everything, yet all of them were external to me. I had not heard from the Lord in my heart. I heard all these voices without, but His was missing within. I could not agree to go without that deepest sense of calling.
So during that week I prayed daily for that sense of Divine calling. Each day passed and each day Hazel prodded me to apply for the fourth place. Was I being stubborn - what me? - or was the Lord checking on whose voice is most important?
That week I was to preach at the Aberdeen Chinese Christian Church. It is a real help if the sermon is submitted in full for interpretation to be prepared. I sensed that the message was to be around Moses at the Burning Bush - read it in Exodus 3 if you are not familiar with it - and I mentioned Moses going about his ordinary business and God breaking in; of God telling him to take off his shoes as a sign of the holiness of the encounter and that he was going nowhere. I therefore sent the script and thought nothing more about it.
Except that as I walked to an appointment that afternoon, I experienced a frisson of joy as I sensed that something I had done which was ordinary needed to be looked at. The ordinary thing was the preparation of that sermon.
The next morning I was sitting in the warm sun, drinking a great Americano, and asking the Lord about that frisson. He directed me to my own sermon. How bizarre. What had been prepared for others was now being "preached" directly to me. I read it through as though someone else was preaching it and came to the last couple of lines -which I had completely forgotten I had written - which hit me full-on, " Put your shoes on and GO!"
That was the word from heaven I was waiting for. My heart leapt with joy and tears flowed over my notebook. I knew beyond any shadow of a doubt, I HAD to go!
I immediately emailed the ministry team at Church and asked to be considered for the place.

More than an inkling

Feeling that nudge as being of the Holy Spirit, I began making enquiries about the trip. There were three people going and they really needed a fourth! I sat with that fact most of the following week.
Then it was announced that there would be financial support for the fourth place. I was certainly beginning to feel the pressure was on!

The next evening I had a meeting with my Trustees, and the subject was part of a wider discussion. One of the Trustees  spoke with firsthand knowledge as to what the trip was actually about. It was clear to everyone in the room that it was completely in line with God's calling, shaping and working through me - I had to go! But...

A Little Nudge

Our Church has a history of sending short term mission teams to various contexts in the world. A team would be going to Zamboanga, Philippines in the summer. Given my aversion to such short term teams - yes I really do have problems with them - I counted myself out.

Then it was announced that the dates had been changed and that the team would be working with Pastor Cesar and several young pastors in the city. I had a visceral nudge. I turned to my wife and said "perhaps I should go" - she nearly fell off her seat - how undignified! - knowing my aversion.
That nudge was the prompting of the Holy Spirit. And so the journey began.